dream – Page 2 – A Life in Words

World War 3, Butter Menthols & a Very Tactile Dream (14-20 April)

Published on April 14, 2014 by Elissa CoxenLeave a comment

Monday 14/4/86

Mark was away at baseball trials and was accepted in the country team (Qld country, that is) Unreal, huh?! Good to see him again – drool. I Failed chemistry like I had the feeling I would 18½/40. Which accounts for 4.625% out of the 10% it was worth. [I’m surprised I didn’t chastise myself here] I should’ve worn a jumper today. It wasn’t cold; but I knew the coolness wasn’t doing me any good with this cold. [We still believed it was better to “sweat out” a cold. Old wive’s tale.] Bio tomorrow (looking forward to it!) Jemima went to NightHawkes Saturday night, with Sharon for Anne-Marie’s party. From what Anne-Marie told me, I gathered no (or not many – esp. M) didn’t go. But I think she might think she’s a bit high-and-mighty now. [I think I’m referring to Jemima here, not Anne-Marie] Wish I could go. I think Fi does too – but she’s allowed anyway. 9:33. Must get some sleep tonight. Am always so tired at school.

A Life in Words — Cartoon published in The Guardian (UK) 15 April, 1986

Tuesday 15/4/86

We are on the EVE OF WW III

Today at 11am, the US bombed the capital of Libia. The USSR have now moved 40 Battleships from the Black Sea to surround 20 US subs in the Mediterraenen. THIS Is the eve of the 3rd World War

I hate the world. Why? Why? Why is there so much hatred & violence & corruption? And to think this is INTERNATIONAL YEAR OF PEACE. WHY CAN’T WE HAVE IT??

I lost my appetite at dinner & this arvy. [My guess is because of the news. I’m clearly quite passionate and I know this hasn’t really changed much, so I take action to avoid getting ‘worked up’ like deliberately not watching the news, or reading papers] It’s 9:00. I hi-lited all the bits about Mark in my diary this arvy. Dunno why. Kept my jumper on all day – don’t feel as clogged up now. Bad mucus this morning. Couldn’t suck it back. Mark is such a spunky name!

Wednesday 16/4/86

They said Reagan bombed Libia again, last night. The feud continues…. I was so bored today. All my subjects except Biology bored me.. Even recreation “Fabric Painting”. Borwing! But sneaked out & talked to Tina S & Deyanne H. Also saw Karen G & Jane O. [All old Smithfield High classmates] But ‘best(??)’ bit was when we were let out at 2:55!! Sharon & me & Cameron talked & joked while waiting for the bus And it was funny! He’s wierd! (Nah!) Forgot about speech again, too. Cold is average – fading. Bad mucus which I can’t suck back or even spit out is always at the back of my throat & is VERY annoying. [I had bronchial issues for a lot of my childhood and if I get a cold nowadays, my recovery is protracted if the infection makes it to my chest.] Is 8:42. I asked mum about Nighthawkes. She said “NO”. Bitch. [What? A mother is a bitch because she won’t let her 15 year old daughter go to a nightclub? For the record, Jemima was never ‘allowed’ either…] Jemima’s smoking. I thought it was Megan’s fault (still do a bit) But apparently Fi said she wanted to start anyway. I think she should do what she feels, but personally I’d hope she’d stop. So does Sharon & Brent & some others. SHARON’s really mad about it. HATES MEGAN TOO.

Thursday 17/4/86

Well, well, well. Today was ‘fair’. My overdue library book which was lost in the art room I finally cleared up. The Librarian(s) was(were) very nice. They didn’t expect me to pay for a book which someone else had misplaced. It’ll just go on the ‘lost book’ list. Spent lunch & time before school with Sharon in Library, doing her english assignment. [I have a feeling I was helping her…not just keeping her company…] And little-lunch I stayed at art room. Made a big mistake – took a packet of butter menthols [throat lozenges] to school – I had about 1/5 of the lot!! [In other words, everyone else ‘scabbed’ them off me.] My mucus congestion was really bad yesterday & this morning. So thick I could neither spit it out or suck it back. But I took 2 sudafed tablets & after period 1, I was clear!! [You don’t say? Pseudoephedrine cleared up your mucous? Wow. Bet it made you a little bit ‘happier’ too…] (Mostly) YAY!! Is 10:06 Went late night shopping at Earlville. Boring – Really. Had Kentucky Fried for tea. Haven’t started my english assign. yet.

Friday 18/4/86

It’s 11:02. I’m bugared, but the Logies will be over in about 30 mins. Today was a “depressing” day. I was shitty (trying to be) with Cameron cos he got shitty when I tried to get on the bus before him. [Wow, really? Chivalry was obviously dead in the 80’s] I think he called me a bitch too. Then, before double art, Steven B & Mark♥?? were ‘crowding’ the door, so I kinda ducked through. I heard Mark mention ‘impatient’. I think he called me impatient. Thinking that upset me [OMG – hypersensitive! It was mostly likely said in jest. But in my defence, I was quite intimidated by him.] then there was general depression thinking about my weekend – boring again. See, Megan (Jemima’s influential friend) has invited almost everyone to her place for dinner Saturday night, to the movies & to her place sunday to watch videos. Except me. She even asked most people right in front of me – I knew she didn’t like me. mima said she did. Didn’t hand in any eng. assignment. Mr Grossetti was away. Russell Francis [a renowned photographer for the city’s newspaper, the Cairns Post] took CAD photos today. I’m gonna be famous!! (Nah.)

Saturday 19/4/86

Oh! I’m a bit warm! I’ve got winter PJ’s on. Wore them last night too and had my covers on too but tonight I’m just right. Earned $23.00. Drums & office work and labelling (or de-labelling) At home I did nothing. Wasted 2 hrs or so. Coulda done HW. Last night my dream was really funny. I actually felt as if it was really happening. For example, Jarrad B held my hand and I could feel the roughness and types of feelings I could expect to feel when a guy holds your hand (not that I know) 11:30 now. I expect the others are out of the movies and all at NightHawkes or something. That’d be right. Leave me out. [I hated “missing out” on things. And especially being “left out”. But this has been a somewhat strong ‘theme’ in my life, so I have to wonder if this is one of my ‘life lessons’?] I am TIRED!! “Grease” was on TV. We’re doing it for CHS school musical. I definitely want a part now!! (Not major)

Sunday 20/4/86

Today was another total waste. I did chemistry homework and that was it. I know I should have been doing my english assignment but I couldn’t get myself to do it. Auntie Hil left today [here I am omitting factual information about others’ lives that is not my place to publicise]. I can see now why Jodie didn’t want to be left in Sydney. [And another bit of ‘hearsay’ relative to the event] That’s kind of “fizzed out” my excitement about going to sydney in Xmastime. Anyway… It’s only 8:40. We just watched the most pathetic showing of the Countdown Music & Video Awards. It was sucked. Boring day. Ate a lot. Eyes are sore.!!

A Mauve Outfit, a White Swimsuit & an Inferiority Complex (16-22 September)

Published on September 16, 2013 by Elissa CoxenLeave a comment

Monday 16/9/85

NO tests. Mrs B drove us home today (Anna, Jay, me & Fi) cos’ she does voluntary work here (at skool) when Julia got home, we drove into town. Walked around.Worst luck imaginable. All the shews [me being deliberate in my misspelling here, sometimes for phonetic reasons] I liked (weren’t many) were either not in ~~that~~ (my) size or colour. Then, I couldn’t find any shirts or anything. Didn’t do any Homework. Am just bugared. [Actually, I have only just realised how much I use this word, which has a much different meaning to the general public! In our family it was a standard term to describe being very, very tired or exhausted, not unlike the other ‘awkward’ expression some use; “rooted”. Is this Australian slang only?] Can’t wait for the holidays. Eventually (finally handed my selection sheet in) I chose chemistry out of that & economics. Someone told Fi it was just like history so I’m definitely not going to do it. Last nite I dreamed about Tim. I flirted with him. He liked my eyes. Was beautiful. [ ..the dream, the scenario or the guy?] Today Fi told us about her dream that she’d failed english test – said her dreams came true. Wished mine would. I have no chance really. [Great Liss, a lot of compassion shown there to your good friend, by lack of commiseration!]

Tuesday 17/9/85

Very late night. German dinner was fun. Got a new shirt from Ambition colourful almost exactly what I wanted and ($30) Diana Ferrari shoes leather ($40) Am happy. At German dinner went for a walk around Woree. Feet a bit sore but no blisters. Was quite fun – not excellent. Guess what! Adrienne & Erica want us to ride to school with them on Friday. I don’t believe it And we’re s’posed to go to the beach after school together. FUN! [Well I clearly felt a social hierarchy at school. My reaction to this invitation reminds me of the Hollywood teen flicks where the Geeks get sucked into nasty pranks by students of the ‘upper echelon’. Of course, this never existed in my time at Smithfield High – at least not to my knowledge or in my personal experience. Erica actually lived in Freshwater and had attended the same primary school as us anyway. I suppose in my eyes she ‘fell in’ with the ‘right people’ once we began high school.]

Wednesday 18/9/85

Quite boring today actually. Ate quite more than I used to (ie when I cut out snacks) In other words I had a big snack this arvy which was NOT NECESSARY. [passive-aggressive self reprimand?] What’ll I wear to the free dress day? I have no clue at all. Shorts? Wot? Went to art room at lunch & finished off my work there. Then went back to L Block & started ach.[achievement] test. Art test tomorrow & maths extension. (Wanna get a hair cut, too.) Got maths back yesterday & guess – 26½/30. I couldn’t BELIEVE IT! Still I deserved it cos I studied. English however 6½/10 & 5½/10 for english response. Umah. Today’s BP test (exam) was easy but I didn’t study enough theory, I don’t think. Am bugared. Nite!

Thursday 19/9/85

Got 61/65 for BP & Art I found stupid but once I started I felt quite pleased with the results. Maths extension test was easy, but I’ve made careless mistakes set. mark is 20-22/30. Went & got hair cut (is much better – keeps out of my eyes) and after went to KMart; found nothing so went to Earlville. Got a great new purple (mauve) skirt & top (earrings too) for $30. Almost lost $20. Almost lost suit to another woman – who picked it up after I tried it on – luckily she didn’t buy it. Went back to KMart to see Dad. (selling tickets) Went home. Have to have my camp menu in tomorrow. I quickly wrote out my choices 2nite but will probably change. Teachers are only going to refrigerate our meat, so I might have to buy a mini eski for my salad, milk, cheese, butter, yogurt & poppers. Also Asked Mr Carter. if I could swap into group 2 said no. I don’t mind. Gotta go to sleep now.

Friday 20/9/85

Rode slowly (I thought) but still beat the buses. Did no work; was a total BLUDGE! Almost wagged german but sprung by Bancroft (lied & got out of it). Art exam 8½/10 Maths 28/30 Excellent! I freaked! Riding home, Erica & Adrienne went to Smithfield Heights to see a friend said they’d catch up to us. Didn’t tho’. I left Fi at Railway Stn, went to shop & bought lollies. Nana came round. She left & we went to Mandy’s. Heath talks a lot now & Matthew is so big. Night at home. Just watching TV. Going to town tomorrow.

Saturday 21/9/85

Doesn’t even feel like the holidays! Went to town with Justine & Kim (her braces are off – looks nice!!) when I got on bus, sat next to Erica and talked to her until Kim got on. In town walked around – I tried on togs & found a really nice pair of white ones which actually “strengthened” my figure. Didn’t look at the price. Pigged out at Sunny Oven Bakery – had a huge slice of Vanilla slice. [I always seemed to go the vanilla slice. I think it’s because I’ve always had a ‘thing’ for custard.] At home – quickly changed & rode to Justine’s. We sunbaked for a little while, then swam, had lunch (watched grandstand – they all taught me the rules etc.) [Not sure what that was, but have a feeling it was something to do with Australian Rules Football, which was foreign to most Queenslanders. Queensland was – and still is so far as I know – a ‘Rugby League state’ in terms of football codes] & swam again. Rode home. People here. Thought they’d stay for tea but didn’t. Is now 12:50. Just finished Trivial Pursuit I WON for once!! YAY!! Mima works in Kaffa – we saw her. She asked me if I was going to the INXS concert. told her I might & she said “well ring me cos no one else wants to go. THAT’S A CHANGE. huh?!! [I clearly held the perception that I wasn’t an important figure in her life, and that in a respect she was of an upper class socially as well – even though she attended a different school. I think I had always ‘idolised’ her, despite having been friends with her for almost a decade by this stage!] doesn’t even feel like the hol’s – YES it does!

Sunday 22/9/85

Today I did nothing – mostly I read the play book nana gave me, watched a little TV & cont’d writing out my 1984 Diary. Dunno if I’ll fit it in the book. [I did!] Ate little, but quite frequently & it was choccy buscuits or smarties or ice cream etc which is terrible. Did I tell you when I was in town yesterday I tried on some white togs which really looked good? Forgot to look at price. There was a blue pair cut legs up to waist made my torso & stomach look lovely but not my legs. [Oh the 80’s! High, high cut gym and swimwear, but low-slung & drop-waisted clothing!] Gonna work tomorrow. Played Triv. Pursuit (T.P.) again. Not too late 2night. Every time I write in this diary (or any) I feel it my duty to fill each page up. I do alright huh?!! In fact, I need more room – [Not wrong there. Almost every entry spills over onto the next day’s space, which in turn pushes the next day’s on, and so on. This transcription involves a fair bit of page-turning.]

Tests, Exams, Assignments & Essays (25-31 March)

Published on June 19, 2013 by Elissa Coxen2 Comments

Monday 25/3/85

Dad told mum yesterday how good we were, ironing our own clothes, washing & drying up & making our school lunches. Guess what we have to do now?!!….. Ran late this morning. Woke at 7:00! Rushed around (at a leisurely pace) [kinda oxymoronic] and made it in time! (to the bus stop.) Science was boring, BP test was synch, German was easy too (but I muffed it up) Maths stupid & boring & english fun! (Bag was heavy 2day! Also still rainy’n’overcast!) First day home. Feels different, somehow not as nice as Dad’s… NO HW, really. Laughed at this set of excuses (a joke sheet which I got from Megan W.) that some people have given their Insurance Officers in their ‘crash’ reports. Talkabout funny…!

Tuesday 26/3/85

Today was a little less wet & a little more hot. Got ready at a leisurely pace this morning. Got my History assignment. Bludged in double art cos’ I didn’t have a plastic bag (or an idea of what to make) for my clay. Maths boring, English 2 to 4 assignments, now. Didn’t get my PES routine etc done so I might ‘hafta’ do it in a lunch hour! BP was fast! After school, read my Dolly – is packed with Fashion, this one! Watching academy awards (57th) Stupid! Never show any clips from the movies

Wednesday 27/3/85

Had a dream about Tim last night. Fiona was going with him & I was jealous, but he seemed to like me better, but wouldn’t drop fiona. It was good. I could see his face clearly too… Today; science test – I mucked it up. German listening test I mucked up, too. Got 28/35 for my reading/writing test. History assignment – I got started – will be easier than my english assignments. Art – I can’t shape a pavlova out of clay! English – 3 assignments. all hard. Maths so confusing! Speech was boring. Jemima seemed un-interested with me today. Brent (a new one) asked her today. Went straight home after speech – then to Geoff’s for National Trust Meeting. Did HW. Got some History assignment done. Very Late night. (‘Horse’ geoff’s cat, loves me! sat in my lap for ½hr) [Impressive…that I let the cat sit in my lap at all. Felines have given me hay fever many a time in the past.]

Thursday 28/3/85

Today was rainy – overcast & cool enough to wear a jumper all day. Science: had Mr McIntyre (Irish teecher) “Had to do wee questions!” [I think you mean Scottish, Liss?] English – comp. test – I’ve failed it! (Was hard) Other period did our reading aloud. Was shaky but got 5/5! Double maths – understand a little, now. History; struggling with assignment. German – went over our test paper. Lazy, gutsy afternoon. Started HW late (around 8:00) Another late nite I s’pose. Probly won’t get all me HW done either….

Friday 29/3/85

Today was cool enough to wear a jumper, too. Bought my new PES shirt today. Is big, but not big enough, I think. Science, marked HW sheet. PES – picked hockey as our new subject unit. German – got 12½/15 for Listening test. Extended little lunch. In form, picked our recreation topics for Wednesdays. I picked swimming at the beach, aerobics secondly, then craft. Sooooo many people picked skating – there’ll definitely be cut down. Art – started different thing. Pav. was too hard. BP – got 34½/40. History – Mr VS made me start again, but I’m on the right foot this time. After school watched TV. ABout 5:45 went to park. Mucked ’round with Julia on swings etc. Good place to think…..Early nite.

Saturday 30/3/85

Today made myself sleep in till 8:00. I must have gotten around 11 hrs sleep cos’ I fell asleep about 9:00 Last night! Anyhow, changed my room around and had a MASS clean up. Then did vacuuming for mum. Finally began my History essay around 3:30 I think. Worked until 6:00 went to tape songs for Countdown but when turned on the TV it was just finished. Watched TV all nite. Movie just finished. Going to bed now

Sunday 31/3/85

I am having a blue bedroom now. My room looks’n’feels just too hot in the arvy sun – so I need a cool colour. I’ve been thinking, too, that I don’t know if I like Sean that much. Tim is such a spunk, I think I’ve taken a liking to him. Anyway what’s new, I’m always dreaming.. Today I attempted (as soon as I woke – 6:30) to do my english essays. Can’t start the animal farm one, tho’ its a little easier & the Yentl one is too hard to continue. Lazed around. Painted my first 3 toenails on each foot & gave myself a quick manicure. Plucked my eyebrows & put some “hair stop” on them. [Again, wonderful examples of my power to procrastinate.] Lateish nite – haven’t learnt for my maths exam. I’ll fail it.