Interior Decorating & Molly’s Death (19-25 August)

Monday 19/8/85

Tonight is supposed to be 14º Last night was cold too. [This is Cairns, remember. 14 degrees can be considered ‘cold’ in the tropics.] Hope we get a nice long cold spell with wind & rain!! (But not for the camp.) Did all HW this arvy & did a little research for history. Am proud that I got it all done before 5:00 (5:15, really!) I hate these little bugs flying around my lamp. They get in my way. Today was “good”. A Life in WordsWatched Animal Farm on video. Bit sad. [George Orwell’s novel Animal Farm is one of the most memorable reads of my life and one of my favourite quotes comes from it: “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others”]  Early night tonight. Going “well” on my “diet”. Looked at my building society passbook. Now I have $29.61. In one year from now, I should have approximately $520 more (if I keep earning ~$10 per week!)!!

Tuesday 20/8/85

Fiona “misses” me. She “mentioned” it in science. I think she’s “upset” that I can talk “easier” to justine. Anyway. On the way home Lucy & Anna got fi & I the last seat (where Clayton normally sits) Fiona didn’t sit there (dunno why) but I did (kinda on the very inside edge.) and Jay sat next to me. Felt wierd. [? Perhaps it was that I was sitting next to a boy? I hadn’t experienced a great deal of exposure to the Male Species in my young life. Mum and Dad’s separation removed even more male energy from my environment.] At lunch went to oval with Sarah – talked about a lot of things. Am so tired. Sun & Mon nites I had early, but slept terribly (waking up both times with bloody nose) I have a “sneeze” cold & my allergies are running hot I HATE IT. My right eye is ITCHY & I hate it. My nose in running & I HATE IT

Wednesday 21/8/85

Today was really topsy turvy. Went to a play at Croswell Hall after assembly (made our Yr 11 subject choices (just indefinite ones)) [Ha, indefinite? I clearly had no idea what that word meant. “Not definite” was what I’d’ve been thinking.] Got the back seat on the bus on the way in (Tim got on, too & sat in the 2nd last seat.) But on the way home Jacki & her ‘friends’ got it. Play was alright – boring. Could see Tim from where I sat. He sat 2 rows in front to my right. Then we got back at the end of little lunch so we had P4 for little lunch. WHoever didn’t go, had to go to class. After that it was a normal Day 4. Boring!! Fiona has a sore neck – under her ears – I think it might be Mumps. Did my english talk. Got 7/10 was stupid.

Thursday 22/8/85

A Life in Words
Who better to illustrate an 80’s style ‘Maillot’ than ‘The Body’? I certainly didn’t look that good in one!

Got the old desk tonight. Cleaned it ‘afore I went to bed. Fiona was away. Beka & I diagnosed “mumps”, yesterday. Could tell Anna was bored with us (me.) Almost conned into going to the Bluelight. I really don’t want to, yet I do. This arvy, bathed, & went to Earlville. Mum had to ‘man’ a National Trust stand & Jules & I walked around. Found heaps of clothes and A PR OF BLACK TOGS maillot style!!! Yipee!! ($36) Then rushed home with a pizza and watched “A Country Practise”. Molly’s death was terribly sad. Had to hold back the tears. I feel quite exhausted now [For those who are too young or not Australian enough to know, “A Country Practise” was a popular 80’s TV serial and this particular episode has gone down in Australian television history as one of the most moving character deaths. I’m fairly sure she was the first character I ever recall passing away as a result of the Big C (cancer) – leukaemia.]

Friday 23/8/85

DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN is a really enjoyable movie!! A Life in WordsI got ready (Justine rang twice) and she came ½hr late so (it started at 8:00) it was 7:00 when we got to “Babooshka”. Mrs McP tried on clothes. I persuaded Justine we leave and get tickets at 7:20 but theatre still wasn’t open so at 7:30 decided to whip around town. Didn’t get to see much at all. at 7:50 whizzed back to theatre Got in line after Shane L. Saw movie. WAS TERRRIFIC! Then (I told mum 11 o’clock) we waited 20 mins (in the dark – but not on our own, thank god) till mum came. I was a bit worried!! Today, fiona came to school. Isn’t mumps!!

Saturday 24/8/85

Worked and earned only $16.25. Got home around 3:00. Took $3 to the fete at 3:00, came back with $3 at 3:15. Was boring. Nothing there. Justine was talking to some TAS girls (can’t remember their names) & (almost) totally ignored me, so I left. At home wanted to change my room around, got cranky towards 4:30 & really hysterical after 5:00. Room just doesn’t feel comfortable when I change it. Maybe I’m not ready for one. So when Dianne & Kerry came at 6:00, my eyes were puffy. Quickly got normal & watched TV untill tea. Had a game of Trivial Pursuit after. We (mum & I) came 2nd!! Is now 12:15

Sunday 25/8/85

Today, woke feeling good. I saw the desk & had an excellent idea how to put it ….. (Guess) ….. it didn’t work, so I was shitty till I worked out how to have it. Spent 12:30 onwards filling the drawers & sorting out school papers/books, so got not HW (let alone study) done. Read little of my book, too. At 3:00-3:30, went to D’s at whiterock. Watched TV & I read. Was fun. Bethlan the little 3 year old girl is a scream! Her brothers Adam (11) & Ben (7) give her a hard time! Stayed for tea. Got home late is now 9:05. Got no HW done, still will wake early tomorrow (6:30) not much to do. American Exchange student comes 2morrow.

Relationship Tests & the Hunger/Thirst Concept (5-11 Aug)

Monday 5/8/85

[Insert hand-drawn musical notes] Torn between two Lovers [insert more musical notes]…. Nah!! I dunno (still) who I like better!! My necklace (crystals – fake) from Jenny broke today. I took it to show my friends. Have lost about eight – ten beads. OH well… Dunno which camp to go on – the one to Little Mulgrave or Tinaroo.(Am really wanting to know which one (or if) Tim’s going on.) It’s a camp just 4 us YR 10’s!! Have begun cutting down on food intake from today. Read an article in “New Idea” about when you feel hungry (whether it be from seeing someone else eating, depression/boredom etc.) to massage certain parts of your body & the hunger pangs die. When I was hungry for dinner, I tried it & sure enough I had ¾ of the amount I would normally have had. Also am gonna try to drink lots water before a meal. Is supposed to fill you up!! Hope it all works!!! [Hmmm, and also dilutes your stomach acids so it kind of hinders the digestive process. You should only drink before a meal if you’re trying to determine whether you are actually hungry, since thirst is often confused as hunger. Either way, you need to wait 10 minutes or so to find out: if truly hungry, the stomach acids will re-concentrate, bringing back your ‘hunger pangs’.] 

Tuesday 6/8/85 A Life in Words

Today was boring. Ate less, but after dinner, demolished almost ¾ tin of peaches. Big brawl with Julia climaxed today – mum tried to make us explain Julia denied everything. She just gets shitty whenever I get a seat nearest to the back [of the bus] than her (or if I get a seat at all) at skool & home she’s fine – but on the bus she talks about me to her friends & gives me dirty looks. Late night tonight. Am going on Little Mulgrave Camp after all, even if Tim doesn’t. (Tina, Fran etc are)

Wednesday 7/8/85

Early night, mum’s at a National Trust meeting. Julia and I are at home on our own!! (Believe it or not!!) We’ll be asleep before she gets home (about 10) Is 8:30 now. Fiona isn’t talking to me. I think it’s because I don’t talk as much to her cos’ I feel that anything I say is stupid, unimportant etc. She, Anna & Megan went to typing room at lunch today. So I went to oval with Justine & Sara. She said to Anna on the bus (when I wasn’t paying attention) “Let’s go to typing again tomorrow.” I think it was a retaliation remark, to hurt me. /// Tim isn’t going on the camp. shucks!!

Thursday 8/8/85

Fiona is still “shitty” with me. She did go to typing today, too. (When I walked Megan to her bus to say goodbye as per usual I asked her how it was – typing – and she went …. i.e. she found it BORING!!) OHH… Also: dunno if I’ll get to go to Mulgrave. Only 40 people can go, and as I only got my form & money in today, I think I’ve pretty well missed out. (See today was a bad day. First I forget my lunch and camp & excursion forms – so ring mum to bring them. then I miss mum so Mr Roff, personally, walks thru’ YR 10 parade to give my lunch etc to me. [ANY connection to the Principal was socially debilitating.] SHAME! then in English I fall (backwards) off my chair!!! BAD LUCK, HUH?!!) Anyhow, as I wrote “Mulgrave Camp only” on my form, it means if I do miss out, I won’t go at all. S’pose that won’t matter cos then I can stay (at skool) & drool over Tim as per usual!!

Friday 9/8/85

[UH-OH…] Distressing news: Tim is crazy over Adrienne P. I knew it. Tina, Erica & Fran talked about it in art. They said if it wasn’t for John, Adrienne would go around with Tim. OH SHIT! Wish I was more outgoing. Fiona still shitty but not as much as before, cos in History, tried to tell her how I’ve changed (she didn’t really like that.) They’re going to CHSS Fete tomorrow. I’m not. Going to work & stay at Dad’s the night. (Jaqui & Anthony won’t be there.) Thinking this arvy how (god I’m ashamed to say this) it would be good to have Shane S. as a “best” friend. Could go to park on Fri’s & talk or something. Stupid, huh?!! But it’d surely be different from a girl friend. (Couldn’t tell as much) Tonite played Trivial Pursuit. Back is sore. Am bugared!! Late nite 12:15

Saturday 10/8/85

Woke early today, shit!! But “slept” in and dad came early. Rushed (& forgot diary & undies & bras!) Anyhow, at work, did a poster for Dad’s “mystery cruise”, next Saturday night (A.O.) [meaning Adults Only] on the “Cougar out to Michalmus Cay (or is it?) HA HA!! Anyhow did more work. Got $24, but dad’ll bank half for me. Went home but mum wasn’t there, so couldn’t get underwear. A Life in WordsWent to Penwardens. Was abit boring. Got hay fever from cat. Practically no diet today – hot dog banana fritter, chinese dinner, caramel tart, pavlova, lemon mousse. Talkabout breaking a diet!! Jaqui & Anthony didn’t go camping. She is still out now (it’s 1:30.) We’re going to bed. Gonna watch “The Day After” about the day after a nuclear bomb. or will I?? See how I feelA Life in Words

Sunday 11/8/85

Jacqui didn’t come home (when we woke at 9:30) the outside light was still on. We went home at lunchtime. I wasted the afternoon I should have been doing my poetry assignment. God I’m a shit of a dickhead. Ate again today had fruit loops 4 brekky at dad’s (& ate crumbs from caramel tart) & had a “frenzy” icecream (Like Sly cones) Did a bitta HW, before. Wrote a list of things I’ll want for my camp & 4 summer. $300 approx total. God!! huh?!! Am gonna watch the DAY AFTER. Well I might to go to bed ½ way thru. Am tired!!

Love Lost & Duncton Wood (4-10 February)

Monday 4/2/85

I’m SO upset!! Sean has left! Yes, he’s gone to Cairns High. Miss him!! Looking forward to seeing him today, but when  I asked Jay, who asked Wade, he told me he’s left – oh, woe is me!!! Were all so talkative today. Got our day 1 timetable. In German, Tina was really nice! She asked us to sit next to her & after the lesson, we walked out together, talking. I really think she’s nice!! Shelley is quite, too! She says hello a lot too! [These were some of the ‘popular girls’ so any kind of attention from them was encouraging for my little Ego] Boring in lessons. Was sleepy. Hot at lunch time. Boring on the way home. At home, covered some of Julia’s books. Did HW, while watching “It’ll be alright on the Night – 4” Funnee!! Late-ish nite ……!!!!

Tuesday 5/2/85

Wet, today. Must be missing Sean a great deal more than I thought, as I’ve almost decided to change schools (to Cairns High, where he is) in Year 11. Got today’s & tomorrow’s timetables today! Science first period days 1, 2, 3!! OH NO!! Excited today, in the pouring rain. I love it!! Excites me. Cyclone has passed by Cairns. Poop! I would’ve loved one! [Would have loved a cyclone for two reasons: the first and most significant would have been time off school. The second; they were kind of exciting affairs – Mother Nature in all her furious glory. Mind you, we had never, and I still haven’t, experienced anything nastier than a category 3 storm. My father has and swears he wouldn’t wish it (Cat 1) upon his worst enemy.] Double English was – boring! Nothing-special-day, today. Neville (that guy at the Bluelight) has Beka’s phone no, now. He likes her, THANK GOD!!! Not much else, today!! Early – no! Late-ish nite. Will take some money to school tomorrow I think!! Raining heavy, now!! GOODY!!

Wednesday 6/2/85 A Life in Words

Today was boring, again. I really hate school, now. Or, at least, Smithfield. Wasn’t hot – rainy, a little windy & cool. Got a hay fever attack at the bus stop, which changed my mood completely. Love this book I’m reading!! “Duncton Wood” about the history of “the Duncton moles”. Is excellent – have to read 6 books per semester in English. This is my first. Assigned seats in German. Double History was boring as ever. Bought a choccy milk for little lunch. The guy in front of me in the que [this is the second time I’ve spelt ‘queue’ in this way; strange (& disappointing) considering English was one of my best subjects] was the one who I always (used to) mistake for Sean ←(Miss him.) Geoff bought a friend round for tea.

Thursday 7/2/85

Went back to speech yesterday. Are not gonna do our theory exam, just drama. Told mim about Sean yesterday. she said she hasn’t seen him, yet…. Today wasn’t ordinary – started off – the heavy night rain had caused Freshy Creek to go over, so we had to turn back (on the bus) and go over Thomatis Creek. And at school today, didn’t do any work! Volunteered to cover textbooks. There were many girls at first, but the number dropped greatly after lunch, as the work ran thin. Was fun – talking!! One guy (have I told you?) [yes, yes you have] looks like Sean at a glance. I’m keeping my eye on him!

Friday 8/2/85 

SWIMMING carnival Trinity won!! AGAIN! 3rd year in a row!! Ran a little lat today. Wore my red fullpiece. Took red’n’white striped Sportsgirl shirt & the book (“Duncton Wood”) I’m reading. Couldn’t afford to take any money to spend, but ended up borrowing off Lucy – 50c & Fi – 40c. Found 10c!! Was quite good today. At least, hardly any rain & even a few glimpses of sun!! Wore jumper almost all day. Was actually quite boring. At the end the teachers had a relay against the kids – they wore flippers and won [cheats!]. Ate my apple on bus. Read book at home. Late nite. watching “Pot Black”. After will be Dave Allen!! A Life in Words

Saturday 9/2/85

(Gordon dropped Danielle yesterday at the carnival. God, was she upset) Horrible day, today. A complete waste of time (I think) and a little energy. I JUST READ ALL DAY!! I finished my (thick) book “Duncton Wood” [THIRD mention of the title, in case you missed it in the previous entries…] It was EXCELLENT. But I hated it – I couldn’t stop crying. [Similar to Watership Down if I recall correctly – a bit of death.] Actually, I could, but it was very depressing. A lovely story – you should read it one (or two!) day(s). [My God, anyone would think I was bi-polar. Loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it, highly recommend you read it – so that you too can be as messed up by it as I?] Ate  surprisingly quite little. Julia went to dad’s. A Life in WordsAt 5:10, got ready to go to Pictures. Saw “Police Academy” & “Caddy Shack”. Both good, but Police Academy funniest. Saw (mim’s) Glen, Kim N & the dreaded, hated Neville. [I still can’t believe my choice of words. So…intense. Matching my FEELINGS?]

Sunday 10/2/85

Also saw Amanda & Janelle last night & Nana came over yesterday) Today did, generally, ‘spring’ cleaning & Homework. I rearranged many things in my bedroom, and have found lots of room now! Went through my old books etc, my scarves & air laces & belts! All sorted out now! Ate little, but what I did was fattening. Quite cool today. Mucked about with make-up. Rang Fi 3 times. Got her the last; about essay. She rang back minutes later with more questions, too! Saw Martin & Patrick ride past – WHOOPEE!!!! Late-ish night. Watching a little of the movie. Eyelids are tired but I’m not…oh, well, back to school tomorrow…….

Nostradamus, Free Dress & Strudel (10-16 September)

Monday 10/9/84 A Life in Words

Can’t believe it’s the last week! Shit! My Maths was (18/30) TERRIBLE. This was the 1st time in my whole life that I’ve never wanted a test mark back. Before the test I even predicted 18/30! I could become another Nostradamus, eh?! [I’d ‘loved’ Nostradamus ever since I’d watched a TV documentary on him – at some earlier point in my life. I have a ‘thing’ for the ‘intangible’ and it’s so much more appealing when scientists get involved. All I recall of his predictions now, is anticipation of World War III and the “Plague of the Twentieth Century” …which I believed to be AIDS/HIV but…??English not bad 6½/10  Slow, boring day. Got a Mr Whippy ice-cream [aah, the soft-serve ‘pig-fat’!] & gave Mandy & Heath a tour of our house.

Tuesday 11/9/84

S(hane) has the paper run now. Shithead. Oh well, I have St Cloud’s job AGAIN – OMYGOD. Another $40! Boring day minus the catastrophe – NANA CAME BACK. God I’m mean. [The Love-Hate relationship I had with my grandmother was mostly due to the Generation Gap; as any teenager would, I rebelled against her ‘out-dated’ beliefs & standards] Free dress day on Friday. Got nothing to wear… [It has just struck me how ‘lucky’  Australians are, that – because uniforms are enforced during our ‘formative’ years – we are not pushed as quickly into the consumerism that is Fashion. I had only one day to stress about “what I’d wear”…can you imagine how ‘imperative’ it would be to shop regularly to maintain a wardrobe for EVERY school day, as in the US? Feed the Machine…]

Wednesday 12/9/84

I said to mum yesterday “I’ll just have to wear my black skirt” & she said “I’ll buy you anything but don’t wear that skirt”. so I’m gonna get an orange top & socks! [I actually don’t believe this was deliberate ‘cunning’ but my, how kids can ‘persuade’ their parents at times.] Did badly in english listening & viewing tests. Had heaps of potato salad, brattwurst, sausages & buns + apple strudel to eat at the german BBQ. I felt sick! Just played games at speech today. Had a late night.

Thursday 13/9/84

Went late night shopping & got a cherry lane, orange cotton shirt (midriff, box shoe, very big) & a black rubber belt. Also a sportsgirl orange bangle. No shop had any orange socks at all left. [The early 80’s witnessed the return – from the 60’s – of Fluorescence in fashion. My fluoro colour of choice was orange.] BP test was easy, but I only just got it finished. Otherwise – boring skool day. Early nite.

Friday 14/9/84

Great day today! Wore all my new gear with mum’s white skirt, black shoes, black lace in hair & additional bangles. BLUDGE DAY! Played cricket in PES. In BP she marked tests, so we bludged. In History watched “Creepshow” in library.A Life in Words [I’ve no idea HOW I watched that movie when I detested the Horror genre (and still do). I can only assume it was for ‘appearances’ sake: to disguise my fear by following the crowd.] In double science did a simple test & an unreal prac experiment. Normal artwork & german was games & puzzles. At home, lazed around till Dad came then worried about what to wear to Jill & Barry’s. (sorted it out) [I often ‘worried’ about outfits; a legacy of Perfectionism. My love of fashion, but lack of ample wardrobe content, combined with body-image issues often resulted in tantrums. “Fat Days” seemed to greatly outnumber the rest, and I have to admit that I still have them, 29 years on. Thankfully ‘reactive tantrums’ have been phased out.] Mulleys went too but Penwardens didn’t. Was a Rage! Talked till the late movie (a comedy) then watched Hoges. Hafta stay the night. Had bad hay fever. (Dad’s too pissed to drive home. So’s R.)

Saturday 15/9/84

Got only 5 hrs sleep cos woke at 8:00. Left at 9:00 & went straight to work. Dad mixed some chemical while Julia & I dressed & STARVED. Went straight to Raintrees – Did shopping & got a custard strudel (for brekky?!) At home, had proper brunch. Lazed around then went to Little Mulgrave to inspect the finishing site of the Hash 200th Run (or something). [Dad was a highly active member of the Cairns Hash House Harriers (a very socially-oriented running club) for many years – virtually since our arrival in the city in 1975 – and many of our family friendships were born of that particular social circle.] Came home, got ready & went to Mulleys. Came home early.

Sunday 16/9/84 A Life in Words

After 10hrs sleep I’m still drowsy. Lazed around this morning. Went to beach – sunbaked with cream on but still got burnt! After lunch, worked, watched TV & Penwardens came. Lyn took us to feed the cats with the new sprinklers there, Jule & I finally worked them out but found the ‘jets’ wouldn’t work. Hafta get dad up 1 day to help me or  the plants’ll die & I won’t get me money. After that we drove back to the San Remo where Dad & Neill already were. Home early from the pub. Watched movie FLASH GORDON was Ripper! Late night.

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Clique Bitchiness & a Haircut Tanty (20-26 August)

Monday 20/8/84

Boring day. Didn’t do any HW previously. Am in trouble with Ger. Fi & me have left the group (but Beka, Justine & Natasha have come.) We don’t want Natasha (we’d rather have Angela) Stayed up till 9:30. Late-ish. Went to Kevin Shorey. He didn’t repierce my ear, just pushed the earring through, so he’s broken the skin at the back. Also, Nana got bronchial asthma. She could die any moment. Please, god NO. [My grandmother was quite a heavy smoker. Stands to reason?]

Tuesday 21/8/84

Today she is feeling better (that’s good) I haven’t told you much about the house lately, have I? Well the frame is up, the roof beams, a few interior walls & electrical sockets & wires. Now that we’ve moved away from the group, (Angela is with us now instead of Tashy) there is an ALL-OUT WAR! We didn’t want one – but – ! On the way home, they talked about us out loud deliberately. Also when I got on the bus, Karen took 1 seat & put her bag on the one in front of that, because there were no other seats left & no one was minding it. Natasha said to Lucy “Sorry but elissa took our seat.” “I did not take anything of yours at all,” I said. “Orrr, not half,” she slurred. BITCH.

Wednesday 22/8/84A Life in Words

The fight is now over. Toni & them made up. Natasha & Rebecca are leaving & so are Fi & I. Today was quite boring. My english assignment, due tomorrow & I haven’t started yet. OH WOE IS ME. Watched the end of ON GOLDEN POND (Watched most of it on Monday in double period.) – Saw last bit today. Am miserable → have itchy eyes & nose & sneezing.

Thursday 23/8/84

THIS IS A FUCKIN’ STUPID HAIRCUT & I HATE THE BAG WHO CUT IT she is a shit. She couldn’t follow some simple instructions & now I look like a freak. Boring school day. Went to town to get a new haircut & the stupid bitch (a new girl) couldn’t cut my hair the way I asked, let alone cut it in a straight line. [Needless to say, the caps and bold type represent extreme anger, which appeared in the diary as rather messy, very heavy-handed scrawl!]

Friday 24/8/84 [Sports Day]

Fixed my hair with mousse this morning – cut it myself just a bit so that it’s spiky. Was GUT! Knew Trinity would win & we did But it was close between us & Clifton. Kewarra got 3rd & Ellis last!! Badly sunburnt. Had a water fight with Melinda S. & Julia at the park. Had the roof-wetting party at the house & I have some type of allergy – I’m sneezing & have itchy eyes & nose. Mum’s gonna take me to the doctor’s for an allergy test sometime. [Sinus issues plagued me as a child. I grew up on skim milk because of the continual flow of phlegm down the back of my throat (a condition known as ‘catarrh’) which was noticeably worse when I consumed whole milk. I ended up seeing an Ear Nose & Throat Specialist at some point in the future, amongst others.]

Saturday 25/8/84

Our ‘blue’ team lost tennis semi-finals Drove home – mim & Fi stayed for Pizza lunch. They went & I started ironing before speech. Diane & Kerry were home; had a look at the house. We met Melinda & Brendan S. He & SHANE have their EARS PIERCED (their mother took them to Kevin Shorey’s, paid for that & even wants to pay for their earrings.) COULDJAWANNA??!!?! [Yeah, the 80’s…Gender-bending! At some stage, the unwritten rule about males with pierced ears was; if it was in the right ear you were gay, if the left you were cool.] After Di & Kerry left, I got ready for the Bluelight. Was good TAS boys (& the girls) were there but nothing happened unfortunately. Mima had a good time with Glenn. I got sore legs again.

Sunday 26/8/84

Ate & ate & ate today – lazed around. Tried to do my english opinionative essay. Got started. ½ done. I’ll hafta wake up early & finish it. Am sooo tired. Late night